September 28, 2012 // 12:36 AM
I seriously think I have an extreme case of pms because I can actually feel negativity exploding out of my ass. HAHAHAHAHA. These feelings are actually making me physically tired. I'm quite unfit, huh? I feel like a little gremlin. ROFLMAO. Bloody terrible. The past few days I've been swearing a lot. Though it was never aloud, I still thought about it. Same thing. I just don't feel happy. I'm not angry or sad anymore. It might be the coffee... I don't know. FEEL SO NUMB.
Previously, I had the urge to become friends with everyone but it has died down, more than died down... it is gone. I honestly do not give a shit anymore. Just let things be. Where did the love go? I don't feel it anymore, man. Kind of hoping it's just temporary... otherwise I'm going to wind up all alone. LOL.
They're all the bloody same. All. The. Bloody. Same.
SHIT MAN. I THINK I TRUST PEOPLE TOO QUICKLY. OH LORD. Never again.
Being my sad little self, I already feel inadequate and falling into the trap of comparison... BOOM, UR DEAD. The feelings really do eat away at you. Of course they stop and I realise that I'm so stupid for feeling this way. THEN THEY COME BACK AGAIN. IT'S INESCAPABLE. You can have 100912920192099202 people tell you why you're great (I wish I had that many people) but it means nothing till you actually believe in yourself.
I thought 18 years of being single has taught me nothing. How I was ever so wrong... I PLAYED THE FOOL. Now I look like a mule. This really is not cool. Man, I'd do anything to kick you into a pool but I don't think I'd ever be that cruel. GOD, I AM BECOMING SAD. FULL WRITING POEMS AND SHIT THINKING IT'LL BE THE NEXT NUMBER ONE HIT.
I'm not the type to dislike someone just because a friend expects me to follow their lead... THOUGH, SOMETIMES I DO BECAUSE I BELIEVE THAT THEY HAVE GOOD JUDGEMENT. Thanks, Julia and Yvy. Spread dat negativity! RAGE AT THE SIGHT OF THAT RODENT. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. OMGHASHKHDSH how funny is rodent... OMFG, mutt. CUT DOWN, BIATCH
We're all such haters towards paper 1 but seriously, belonging is so applicable to real life.
YO, CITY IS MINE. WHICH ONE? T-O-R-O-N-T-O... YOU KNOW HOW THE STORY GOESSSSS
SORRY FOR NOT BEING FUN AND PLAYFUL. SHIT. I LIKE TO WATCH KOREAN PEOPLE DANCING IN MY SPARE TIME AND THINKING ABOUT EATING A BEEF KEBAB. SORRY FOR NOT BEING NORMAL, EFFORTLESS AND JUST NICE. GOD.
I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I really, really don't.
These apparent problems I have just all go away when I talk to my mum. I don't even talk to her about it... just talking and laughing with her makes me realise the more important things in life. In that moment, I genuinely felt happy. MY HEART FULL WARMED UP AND ERRTHANG.